GalacticCactus Forum
Forums => English & Linguistics => Topic started by: Jonathon on May 17, 2006, 02:03:16 PM
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In the middle of a manual about currency trading, I come across this: "The USD/CHF chart shown in Figure 2.4 illustrates that since 9/11/2001—the commencement of the war on terror including actions in Afghanistan and Iraq—the Swiss franc has been gaining in value compared to the U.S. dollar."
The war on terror does not include the actions in Iraq. Even though I'm desktop publishing and not editing, I can't not change something so politically ignorant. So how do I best rewrite it?
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Any chance you can get away with simply removing the entire parenthetical phrase?
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The war on terror does not include the actions in Iraq.
That's highly debatable, and I wouldn't call either position ignorant.
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The administration certainly thinks it's actions in those countries are part of the war on terror. ;) Could you change it to something like 'Afghanistan and other countries'?
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Any chance you can get away with simply removing the entire parenthetical phrase?
I think that's probably the most elegant solution. I don't think that phrase is really essential to the meaning.
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Exactly what I was thinking.
Because I agree with what I believe you were implying initially -- political statements really do not belong in a training manual on currency. Especially controversial ones.
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The war on Terror didn't commence until a month after 9/11. And of course the war on Iraq commenced over a year later- which I think is the main reason people have trouble connecting the two.
But lest we make the same mistake of getting into a political discussion on a grammar board :P
I'd say "9/11/2001 and the subsequent U.S. war on Terror" and leave it at that. Unless the chart illustrates more activity in 10 or 11/01 and 3/03, and then you would need to change it to talk about "events significant in the war on terror."